It really shouldn’t surprise me how that God pays attentions to the details of our lives. Sometimes it’s incredibly overwhelming to think that the God who created the entire universe and everything in it is intimately concerned about even the really small things in my life. He knows the number of hairs on my head. He cares whether I choose to pursue this career or that. Sometimes, God even shares His opinion on what I should eat for breakfast. And that’s absolutely amazing to me!
When you think about the fact that the entire Bible is about having a relationship with God, it makes total sense that God cares about the details. After all, I share those details with my best friend, don’t I?
And maybe saying He cares is less accurate than the fact that He just wants me to share like that with Him. I mean I can’t really say my best friend cares about the details of every facial expression and tone of voice in that conversation I had with that one person that one time that really affected me, so much as she cares about me and the things that are important to me at the time. Maybe it’s the same with God. It’s not necessarily earth-shattering whether I decide to eat a fiber bar or a donut for breakfast, but it is kind of earth-shattering if I share those moments with God because it builds a relational intimacy with Him that really does affect every aspect of my everyday life.
David appreciated this in Psalm 56:8 when he wrote: “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” If God keeps track of things like the number of hairs on my head and the tears that I cry in the midst of sorrow, then of course He would remember my prayers! I mean that’s the entire reason I pray them, right?! It’s to share with God the needs and cares that I have in the hopes that He will do something about them.
The hard thing here is that God is eternal, while we are finite. Time holds a lot more importance to us than it does to God. After all, time is short. Life is short. And for those of us in Western societies, time really holds a lot of control over our lives. We are addicted to check lists and work and constant busyness in an effort to make our mark on the world and leave a legacy. So it really comes as no surprise that sometimes before God answers my prayer, I’m on to the next thing…the next care…the next worry…the next desire.
This really came into focus for me recently when I was talking to God about this waiting time as I look for restoration in my marriage. In the scheme of standing for marriage restoration, my time of waiting has not been much. In the scheme of eternity, I’m sure it’s even less! But waiting for many of us feels never-ending. Sometimes I wonder if God remembers that we are governed by time down here on earth. He seems so slow in moving sometimes! And it was while I was reminding Him of the fact that we are governed by time and need things to go a little faster than an eternal perspective might merit that He laid this little bit of revelation on me.
He said: “Remember when you met your husband in high school? And you began praying that he would know me and that he would give his life to me and be saved?” I remembered. I had had a dream that my husband–then my recent ex-boyfriend–and many of our classmates and I were in a long line in front of a desk. We were being separated to the left and to the right. Those who I knew were Christians were going to the right, and those who I knew were not were going to the left. I was sent to the right when I reached the desk, but my husband and a few of my friends were headed to the left, and I knew what that meant. I’d read enough of the Bible to know that the sheep go to the right and into heaven while the goats go to the left and to an eternity of torment! I did not want that fate for people in my circle. I begged to take their place. I pleaded with God to give them another chance…to send someone who could convince them of the truth of the gospel.
And then God said this: “Honey, I know you are praying for your husband to come home and for life to be perfect again. I know you want that more than anything in the world right now. But…. I am still working on your first prayer for him.”
Wow!
God knows exactly what my husband needs. He knows exactly what I need. And while it may seem so incredibly hard to be separated from the love of my life right now, the truth is that if my husband does not give God lordship of his life…well, we will probably keep repeating this cycle over and over and over again. And when time is up, it’s up. There won’t be one more gospel message to give him the opportunity to repent. It will be game-over! In the scheme of eternity, my husband’s salvation is of far more concern to God than our marriage, even though our marriage is important too.
And then God brought to mind my more recent prayers: prayers that my husband would be kinder, prayers that he would be the head of the household that God had called him to be, prayers that God would equip him for the ministry he had been called to, prayers that he would be able to forgive those who had hurt him, prayers that God would change him….. Oh, so many prayers! God remembers each and every one. He intends to answer each and every one.
Maybe you find yourself in a waiting room, waiting on the answer to a prayer you have been praying for a long time. If you think back, you may find that many prayers along the same theme have gone before….and maybe not just your own prayers, but the prayers of others prayed over you or in agreement with you. The waiting room is hard. It’s a lonely place. It’s an uncomfortable place. But perhaps you are there because God is still answering the very first prayer you prayed because God remembers them all, and He knows what order to answer them in so that it all works together for good!
A Beautiful Mess 