Cultivating Joy

God wants us to enjoy our lives. He wants us to experience joy every day. In fact, Jesus said in John 10:10 (AMPC) that He came that we “might have and enjoy life and have it in abundance, to the full, until it overflows.” If Jesus came so that we might have and enjoy life, why do we spend so much of our time grumbling and complaining and not enjoying our lives? Sometimes I think we don’t realize that God wants us to enjoy life. We often picture God as distant, removed, cold, and serious. If that’s your picture of God, it would be hard for you to believe that He approves of you relaxing, playing, or having fun and enjoying life. The truth is that God is not distant, removed, cold or serious all the time.

In Genesis, God creates things for His pleasure. He calls them good. He makes trees and plants that are pleasing to the eye. God takes delight in His creation. He enjoys it. Throughout the Bible God laughs, He sings, He rejoices, He delights, and He dances. Jesus was God in flesh. When we look at Jesus, we get a picture of God the Father. Jesus said that anyone who had seen Him had seen the Father (John 14:9). So what was Jesus like when He walked the earth? We find Jesus eating and drinking and enjoying company. Apparently, Jesus’ enjoyment of life in general caused the Pharisees to accuse Him of being a glutton and a drunk (Matthew 11:19). In fact, Jesus’ first miracle was turning water into wine. An act done solely for the enjoyment of the guests at a wedding feast which He was attending. It served no purpose other than pleasure.

If God found joy in His life here on earth, we can find joy in our lives as well. Sometimes we confuse joy with happiness or giddiness. We think joy is a feeling of intense happiness, but joy can be quiet calm delight and contentment. Joy isn’t dependent upon our circumstance. Joy is a choice. It is a fruit of the Spirit, which means that because we have the Holy Spirit living within us as believers, we are full of joy already. All the fruits of the Spirit are present within our spirits when we are born again, but it is up to us to cultivate them into maturity. Joy exists within our spirits in seed form. It’s up to us to cultivate it so that it grows into a fullness we experience every single day.

How do we cultivate joy in our lives?

1. Abide in Christ. Abiding in Christ means dwelling with Him and living with Him. It means allowing our relationship with Jesus to be a large part of our everyday life. Our relationship with Jesus isn’t just a casual once-a-week acquaintance. It’s meant to be a daily, intimate relationship. When we remain in close connection with Jesus, we experience the fullness of life that He has planned for us. We experience the fullness of His love for us. We experience a fullness of joy (John 15:11).
2. Meditate on the right things. Our thoughts have a huge impact on our attitudes and beliefs, which in turn have a huge impact on our behavior. If we’re constantly dwelling on negative thoughts or we’re constantly focused on the things around us that cause us stress or discouragement, then we can’t possibly hope to find joy in our everyday life. Instead, if we want to feel joy, we need to focus on thoughts that bring us joy. Philippians 4:8 says, “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” When we think on these things, we open the door for joy to enter into our lives.
3. Take the time to smile. We all know the song: “If You’re Happy and You Know It..” The chorus tells us that “If we’re happy and we know it, then our face will surely show it.” It’s amazing how much seeing someone else smile at us or taking the time to smile ourselves lifts our spirits. Proverbs 17:22 says, “A joyful heart is good medicine.” Proverbs 15:13 says, “A joyful heart makes a cheerful countenance.” We already know that out of the abundance of our heart, our mouth speaks. We know we can change our outlook by speaking words of faith rather than words of unbelief. Likewise, our face can show what we’re feeling deep in our hearts. We can change our outlook on our day simply by changing the expression on our face. Take the time to smile, even if you don’t feel like it in the moment. It will lift your mood until your feelings match your smile.
4. Let go of unreasonable expectations. Oftentimes, feelings of disappointment and discouragement are based on unreasonable expectations. We have expectations for how life should be or how our spouse should treat us or how we should respond to situations. When those expectations are unmet, they cause feelings of frustration and disappointment. Unmet expectations are a thief of joy. When we let go of the expectation that joy demands some type of huge, miraculous, burning-bush type moment, we open the door to finding joy in the little things. We free ourselves to enjoy our lives.
5. Develop an attitude of gratitude. In the midst of life’s stressful moments, it’s hard to remember the good things that happen. Our brains seem to be wired to focus on negative things. It’s far easier for us to remember the one bad part of our day than it is for us to remember all the good things. That’s why making the choice to be grateful and cultivating a grateful heart can have such an impact on our enjoyment of life. This requires intention. When I’m having a good day, it’s easy to end that day thanking God for all the good things that happened, but when I’m having a bad day, it gets harder to be thankful. I pray the Examen in order to help with this. As I pray, I go through my day and think about all the times that I felt joy, all the good times, and also all the times that I felt God’s presence. I thank God for all these things. Then I go through my day and think about the times when I didn’t feel God’s presence. As I think of these things, I ask God to show me where He was in that moment. Often when I do this, the Holy Spirit will change my perspective and draw my attention to something I didn’t notice before. He gives me something to be thankful for, and suddenly my entire outlook about my day changes.

Often all it takes to enjoy our life in the everyday, mundane moments is a change of perspective. When I allow God to define my day, when I seek His presence in those moments, when I focus on the positive and on being grateful, I enjoy more and more of my day. I find joy in the everyday moment. This isn’t an instantaneous change. It’s a process. That’s why I like to think of it as cultivating joy. when you cultivate a seed, it doesn’t sprout overnight. It takes time. It takes intention. It takes practice. But in time, that seed will sprout and grow and become mature and fruitful. The same is true with the seed of joy. By taking time, by being intentional, by putting small changes into practice, in time we can see mature and fruitful joy in our lives.

The Bible promises that God is always working on us. He is changing us from glory to glory, making us more like Jesus. Jesus enjoyed his life. He laughed. He danced. He sang. He had fun. He enjoyed time with friends. We can do the same.